As I am approaching my 60th birthday, I am filled with excitement! This is now the start of the next ‘chunk’ of my life, my proper Crone phase………. I can now embrace myself properly. Proper? I keep using this word, don’t I? Perhaps I haven’t felt ‘proper’ for a long time. I didn’t retire properly, I haven’t had a proper diagnosis for my pain condition (yet).

Perhaps 60 will be a bit like being a teenager again, because I will be a young Crone, with the next 30, or even 40 years stretching ahead of me (gulp!)……… I am certainly entering my 61st year in a better mental and physical state than I did my mid 50’s. It is surprising of me to say that really, as I still suffer from chronic pain and fatigue of the same intensity and constancy as before, BUT – I’m getting fitter despite it. And that is because now I dance again…….. I have been afraid of hurting myself by exercising for years. Even with all my knowledge as a physio, I was still scared. I didn’t want to hurt more, to sensitise further my already sensitive body. But I don’t hurt more (well perhaps on Tuesday’s, my Fitsteps class night I do), but it is so, so worth it. My legs are moving quicker, I can actually hop a bit, and do skippy moves, and now keep up with the others better than I used to. How bloody marvellous is that? Pretty bloody marvellous, I can tell you!

I want to be lean, and strong, and resilient. Even if I eventually get some sort of diagnosis from the rheumatologist in May, I will keep on this path now. I think the hyperbaric oxygen kick started this new attitude, and an absolute determined will to dance everyday. I usually dance to Honky Tonk Woman, Love Shack, and Brown Sugar, but change it around as well. I practice all the steps from my class -quick changes of leg direction, and Pasa arm flinging actions. I didn’t start out gently in the beginning either – because my spirit was strong, I just dove straight in – albeit slower than the rest of the class. My physio voice was saying “take it gently, baby steps…..” My warrior voice said ” “Go for it, dance your socks off…..” So I did! Hooray! I am so glad I did.

Sixty also seems like a ‘proper’ age to be retired (even though I’m a few years away from my state pension – grrrrrrrrh), so it might feel a bit more proper, and not awkwardly guilty (my stuff, I know).

I feel very blessed to be approaching 60, I have never felt like this about a ‘big’ birthday before. It seems highly significant and very positive. My 50’s have been difficult, and who knows what my 60’s will bring – but I’m going to dance my way through them with courage and grace ………